


I'll Walk Alone

by Lucifirs



Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: 1940s, Alternate Universe - 1940s, Alternate Universe - High School, DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, F/M, High School, M/M, Supernatural - Freeform, Supernatural AU: 1940's, Supernatural AU: Not Hunters, Teen Years, War, World War II
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-26
Updated: 2013-10-28
Packaged: 2017-12-30 13:54:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1019414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucifirs/pseuds/Lucifirs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>During the early 40's, Castiel Novak, a teenage boy, moves to Lawrence where he starts High School for the first time after being homeschooled his whole life. Still recovering from his Father's death in Germany, Castiel finds it hard to fit in with his new classmates.<br/>That is, until he meets his Green Eyed Boy.<br/>War, expectations, school and everything in between  puts a strain on the relationship neither of them will admit they want to have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was with a heavy mind that Castiel Novak strode into class on his first day of highschool. 

He had been homeschool since he was around six years old, so the education part of this was going to be a piece of cake. Calculus, American history, biology, he could do it all.  It was the social aspect of it all that had him gritting his teeth, and clenching his fists in the pocket of his long tan jacket. The only kids he'd really ever interacted with before were his siblings. Castiel felt like a piece of meat dropped in a shark tank. 

His first class of the day was Language Arts, an enjoyable subject for him, so Castiel shuffled along the hallways excitedly, his schedule gripped tightly in one hand and his book bag slung hastily over his shoulder. He let his eyes scan carefully over each wall, searching for the door with the large "LA - year 9" printed across its front. It didn't take long for him to find it. 

Slipping inside, and choosing a seat far in the back, Castiel let out a long sigh of relief. No one had noticed him.

It was a fairly small class for the school's standards - with only about twenty four or so other kids inside and seated. With a forced smile, he settled in quietly, letting his things rest upon the floor at his feet, and turned to the front. The room was silent, save for a few whispers and giggles from a group of girls sitting towards the left side of the room. They smiled a bit too widely, and the way they flung their hair over their shoulders made Castiel roll his eyes. They erupted into another bubble of laughter and Castiel's eyes immediately followed theirs, in hopes of catching what was so funny. In their midst was a tall, lanky boy wih gelled back hair, bright green eyes and a dark smile. His eyes scanned each of the girls as they chatted, flirting probably, and it was only when the teacher strode in that he clamped his lips and turned in his chair to face the front again. Castiel made a mental note to himself to stay far, far away from that kid. He seemed like trouble. 

At the front of the class, the teacher began to talk. 

"Welcome to your first Language Arts class of the year." She seemed tired, with her slouched shoulders and breathy way of speaking and Castiel frowned in pity. Poor thing. Kids sucked.

Her lips were set in a straight, solemn line and she looked upon each student with her serious grey eyes. "I'll be both your LA and homeroom teacher, so if you have any problems come speak with me. You may call me Ms. Milton." She paused, giving the students time to ask questions if they chose to. No one spoke. 

"Since this your first day of highschool, I believe it would be a good idea to pair you with another student-" Her words trailed off, and she turned took a deep breath before Ms. Milton carried on, explaining the purposes of the buddy-system. Castiel's blood ran ice cold. He was hoping he could fly through this grade by sitting in the back and ignoring the faces around him. This whole year was just getting off to a bad start.

Finally, Ms. Milton picked up a long sheet of paper, and began to call out names, and who they would be paired up with. Sweat began to collect on Castiel's palm, and he bit his lip, hoping they wouldn't stick him with someone awful. Eventually, Castiel heard the dreaded call of his name. 

"Castiel Novak and Benjamin Lafitte?" Her grey eyes flicked up, and she gestured for a tall, heavily built boy to stand and move next to him. He had short hair, cut so close to his scalp that if Castiel had seen him from a far distance it would have appeared to him that he was bald. His chest was thick and dense looking, and he stood like a proud king or warrior.  Castiel swallowed hard, eyeing the tough demeanor of this boy, and sent off a silent prayer that he wouldn't tear him to pieces. A small part of Castiel's mind laughed at his worry, knowing fully well that although he didnt look strong, he definitely could defend himself. Castiel had never been in a fight, but growing up on a farm had provided him with some muscle mass. 

The boy turned, and strode to the back to seat himself in the desk Ms. Milton had pointed out. It was attached to Castiel's. As the boy walked towards the seat, he watched his face closely, and felt a slight wash of relief go through his as he saw how warm his eyes were. They flitted nervously around, but other than that Benjamin looked completely at ease. His face was round and kind, showing nothing but curiosity as he eyed up Castiel.  A small smile creased his lips as the other boy seated himself, and Ms. Milton read off the next pair. 

 "I'm Benny," He whispered, offering his hand below the desk. Castiel shook it. 

"I'm Castiel, but you can call me Cas." He replied while looking about the room.  Nearly every student was paired up with another, with the exception of the the Green Eyed boy and a couple small, shy kids. Castiel felt sorry for whoever ended up with him. 

"You new to Lawrence?" Benny asked, and Castiel noticed a slight southern accent to his words. He nodded. 

"Moved here a month ago from Washington." 

Benny nodded and smiled. 

"Your pa get a job or something here?" 

"No." Cas said softly "He was killed in Germany. I'm staying with my foster parents now." 

Benny looked away immediately in embarrasment and bit his lip. 

"I'm sorry, Cas..." Benny said quietly, turning to face the front again. Cas was used to that - all the "I'm sorry"'s and "It's too bad"'s.... It didn't mean anything to him anymore. He tried to change the subject. 

"S'okay. You new to Lawrence?" He asked, keeping any sadness or bitterness from his tone. He didn't want Benny to feel embarrassed around him. Afterall, if they were going to spend the year together then they might as well be comfortable talking about things like that. Benny smiled before replying.

"Nah. Moved here when I was in year four. I was born in Texas." He grinned again, although he wasn't looking at Cas. 

They stayed silent for a few minutes while up at the front, Ms. Milton was blabbering on about some writing crap that Castiel didn't really pay attention to. He was a whiz at this stuff. He could take whatever she threw at him without her instructions. In the midst of her words, Ms Milton pulled a box out from under her desks, and began reaching in, pulling out thick blue books. She handed a stack to each row of desks, and slowly but surely they were handed back. 

"What's this?" Castiel whispered to Benny, feeling foolish for thinking he didn't need to listen. Benny smirked. 

"We'rent you listening?" He asked, taking their books from the girl in front of them. He handed the bottom one to Castiel. 

"No." 

Benny sighed and flipped open to the first page. It was blank. 

"They're journals. Gotta write in 'em every day. Seems to me we're writing a diary." he sneered, pulling a pencil from his bag. Castiel did the same, and looked down curiously at his book. 

This could be fun, he thought. A nice, private release. 

~~~

_4/9/41_

_My dad's dead._

_It sounds weird, writng it out. Like it hasn't really happened. But it has._

_I remember the look on Ma's face when the man came to our door; clad in a sleek, form fitting uniform that made his shoulders and chest stand out. A true soilder. She didn't seem impressed though. The way she wrung her hands together and leaned out on the tops on her feet like she was hanging desperately on to every word he said seemed scary and confusing to me. I remember the way her face slowly dropped with every second, and how it began to splinter into a red, teary mess. I ran to her, not knowing what else to do, and I remember the man setting his hand on my shoulder with a sympathetic look, and the way my voice barely squeezed from my throat when I asked him what happened._

_"Your Father's gone."_

_My veins turned to ice, and my muscles curled around Ma almost like a reflex. I didn't know what to do._

_After that, Mom just took off. All she left me was five dollars and a small note taped to my bedroom door. It was the most money I'd ever held in my hands at once, but I was anything but thrilled._

_"Dear Cas,_

_I've gone away for a while, just to be alone. I don't know when I'll be back, so go stay with Gabe. I love you very much, and I want you to stay strong. That's what Dad would have wanted. I'll miss you._

_Mom."_

_At first, I didn't know what to think. With Ma gone, Dad dead, and no family for miles, I felt lost. My big brother - Gabe - lived in the next town over, but I was a fourteen year old kid on my own. I couldn't drive. Ma took the car, anyway, so even if I could I'd still have to walk._

_With the five dollars in hand, I ran to my room and gathered everything I'd need. A comb, toothbrush, generic clothes, my thick wool coat, and my favourtie Dinah Shore record were all stuffed neatly into my suitcase I kept under my bed. As I left the room, I grabbed the note off my door, and stuffed it into the pocket of  my cotton trousers. Not once did I look back as I headed down the road to Gabe's house._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't get a chance to edit, but I'll probably go back and do that if I have time. If you guys see any typo's or anything let me know!

A cold icy blast of wind pummeled Castiel as he trudged his way to school, ruffling his already messy, dark hair and lifting up the bottom of his thick wool coat, exposing his thin cotton shirt. He shivered, and pulled it back down into place with a jerking movement, careful not to drop the bookbag that he had slung over his shoulder. It was only late October but already there was a light, powder like dusting of snow upon the ground. It made walking to school an unpleasant experience, leaving Castiel grumbling angrily to himself. 

"Gonna be late. Geez, this is awful. Benny is gonna be so mad at me."  He sighed, pulling his toque down far enough that it covered the tops of his ears.

Even though the sky was thick with full, black clouds, the air was still painfully bright. Castiel squinted against it and decided that it must be the weak sunlight relfecting off the snow. This was just an awful day.

The air seemed to be alive, dancing around him and suddenly it blew an impossibly strong and sharp gust of wind directly at Castiel, causing him to stumble back and loose his footing. The ground slipped beneath him, and with a shriek Castiel slammed bottom first down onto the concrete, dropping his bag. Books, pencils and paper scattered out around him in a clamour that echoed off the surrounding buildings. Shocked, he blinked slowly up at the sky, trying to wrap his mind around what had just happened. Despite the numbness of his skin, he could still feel pain inch it's way up his spine, making his head spin and his stomach churn. he closed his eyes and let out a long groan of pain. 

"Hey, hey! you alright!" A sudden voice called out above the wind. It was laced with concern, and was soon followed by rushed footsteps. "Can you hear me?" 

Rolling his blue eyes open, Castiel lifted his head and looked drowsily up. His mind was fogged with pain. The pale, freckled face of another boy loomed in above him, staring down and rambling to himself in a panicked voice. He  seemed annoyingly familiar, but Castiel couldn't put a name to him. 

"Oh geez, oh geez. You alright bud? Oh jeepers. That was a bit of a fall. H-Here, I, um, I'll get your books." Suddenly, the face popped out of veiw, and Castiel propped himself carefully up on his elbows, cringing against the sharp pain that sparked in his tailbone at the movement. He gasped, and fell back down against the frigid ground. Today was just an awful day indeed. 

"Ah- ah..." Castiel groaned, and the familliar boy who had begun to gather his books stopped immediately, and placed a supportive hand under his neck. 

"Woah, pal, ease up there. I got your books. Just relax..." He trailed off, looking up and around, probably for some help. He had smooth skin, practically blemish free which was unusual for a kid his age. His eyes were impossibly round and vibrant, and they looked over everything with a certain hard edge. 

Suddenly, he realized who it was.

This was the Green Eyed Boy in his LA class. The boy he'd never talked to, and the boy Benny had warned him about. 

"Ah- I... I'm alright." Castiel said angrily, trying again to sit up. The pain shot up his back again, angry and obnoxious, but he gritted his teeth and toughed it out. He didn't want to be alone with this boy, and if that meant crawling to school then he would crawl. 

The Green Eyed Boy cocked his head to the side, watching Castiel in slight confusion and let out a disbelieving snort of amusement.

"No, man, relax. You're not okay." His voice was deep for their age, and it completely clashed against his delicate features. They didn't seem to match up. "Let me at least help you stand." 

"No, really. I'm fine."  Cas snapped.

"Okay then. Walk. Betcha' can't do it." 

Castiel didn't know why, but this boy  _infuriated_  him. He was too cocky, and too sensitive. Or maybe Castiel was just embarrassed and needed something other than himself to be mad at. 

All he managed to do was take one step before the pain completely overtook him, making him cry out and stumble. Luckily, the boy caught him.

"Told ya'," he grinned, placing Cas' arm around him shoulder. He had his bookbag in hand, and he was beaming down at his red face. 

"Shut it, meathead." Castiel grumbled, reluctantly taking this boy's help. Whatever. He couldn't walk on his own, so he might as well suck up his pride and put his energy into making it to school on time.

 Together, they shuffled all the way to the school house where the Green Eyed Boy set both him and his bookbag down on the low, grey steps. Castiel was shivering nearly violently, and the boy smiled reassuringly. He was just moving to take his first step towards the school before Castiel reached out and caught his sleeve. 

"What's your name?" He asked, still cringing and stuttering from both pain and cold. 

"Dean. You?" 

"Castiel, but you can call me Cas."  Why was he even telling him this? It wasn't like they were going to be talking anytime after this. He was going to take his help, and then that was it. Benny wouldn't warn him for no reason. 

Dean smiled widely, and Castiel swore the sun had come out from behind the clouds because a rush of warmth washed through him. Or maybe it was his injury. But it was definitely not Dean. Nope. No way. 

"Well, Cas, hang in there while I get some help." 

 ~~~

_21/10/41_

_Today was real awful. First, it snowed, then as I was walking to school I tripped and landed smack on my butt._

_It sucked._

_Nurse says I just bruised my tailbone, and that it's nothing major but it hurts a hell of a lot for just a bruise. I can't even stand or walk or sit or anything without it causing me troubles. Benny says I'm being a big baby, but he isnt the one limping around and having to put an icepack on his back when he sleeps._

_Anyways, I talked to 'him'._

_That's what Benny refers to him as, 'Him'. I think he has a real grudge against him or something, cause he's never been any trouble to me or anyone else. Actually, since this is a school journal I'm gonna' keep calling him that. I know you said this would remain private and only you would read them, Ms. Milton, but still. This somehow feels too personal. 'He' came running after I'd fallen to help, and I kind of snapped out at him. Everytime he spoke, no matter how gentle and concerned I'd just spit out something with a nasty tone. Looking back, I actually feel real' bad for acting the way I did, but he didn't seem to mind. It was almost kind of like he was used to it... Maybe I should talk to him._

_After I got to school and had the nurse examine me, I remember walking to class with this weird bubble in my stomach. Kind of like butterflies but just.... Off. I dont know what it was, but my best guess is that 'He' had really freaked me out. I mean, other than Benny I didn't really talk to anyone. That worked out in our favour though, because now we're really close._

_We had Math class first, so when I slid down into my desk I was really, really surprised to see Benny no where near me. His books weren't there, and neither was his bag so at first I thought he must have stayed home sick. But, all my assumptions were proved wrong when I heard a deep, rumbling laugh from across the room. I turned to look, and frowned in exasperation as I saw Benny, knees deep in some heavy flirting with a dark haired girl I'd never seen before. She was really pretty, with wide brown eyes and perky pink lips. Her hair fell in cascading waves down her back, and she had a real sly look to her. She was perfect for Benny._

_Few seconds later, Benny turned in my direction and winked before bidding goodbye to the girl and rejoining me at our desk. He was all flustered, and before I could even open my mouth, he leaned over and whispered to me;_

_"I'm goin' ask that girl out."_

_"What?" I asked. Benny wasn't one for romance. This must be big. "Do you even know her?"_

_"Of course!" Benny seemed offended " She's new, and beautiful. And bad. Wow, she's so great... Her name is Meg, she likes nighttime walks, sneaking out, and all this other stuff. I don't really remember. I was distracted by her lips" He grinned slyly, and I bumped him with my shoulder, wincing slightly._

_"You're real' smitten with her, then?"_

_"Yeah... How could I not be?"_

_I shrugged, and looked to the girl. Sure, I thought she was pretty but I wasn't really attracted to her. She had the whole "Bad" vibe going, kind of like the one 'He' has. I don't know if those are the kinds of kids I should be talking to. I guess this works out well for the both of us. Benny won't have to worry about me stealing his girl. Actually, now that I think about it, none of the girls here really do it for me..._

_Huh._

_Oh well._

_Anyway, after Benny had finished drooling over her, I finally got a chance to explain to him what had happened this morning and why i didn't meet up with him at our usual spot. He didn't really listen closely, but when I mentioned 'Him', he perked up right away._

_"Oh geez. I've heard he's trouble."_

_I asked him what he meant, feeling uneasy._

_"Dunno, really. What I do know is he's one tough son of a bitch. Take you out in two seconds flat. His pa was in The Great War, and I think he might have given 'Him' some special soilder training or something. His brother's a sweet kid though. Four years under us. If you really wanna know about him I'd go to him"_

_I didn't reply to him, but for the whole day up my mind couldn't shake the images of 'Him' that floated through my mind. Maybe I should go talk to his brother. Hopefully it'll get rid these obnoxious thoughts._


End file.
